Understanding The Different Love Languages <3
Let’s talk about love. More specifically, the five different love languages. This concept was created by marriage counsellor, Dr. Gary Chapman when he published his book, ‘The 5 Love Languages’ in 1992. Although you may relate to more than one, it is likely that one speaks to you more than the others. Knowing what your partner’s love language is and expressing your own, can help to build and maintain a healthy relationship.
Soooo…
What are they?
The concept essentially implies that we all give and receive love in different ways. It is the study of human behaviour that explains further how we react in various ways. Dr. Chapman categorised the love languages to be:
Word of affirmation
Acts of service
Receiving gifts
Quality time
Physical touch
Let’s get into them one by one.
Words of affirmation
Compliments. Affection. Praise. Encouragement. If this is your love language then the implication is that you thrive off of verbal acknowledgements. You may feel that you need these to feel understood and appreciated by your significant other. Often, these people will find it harder to let go of harsh words spoken to them and/or take them more personally.
Acts of service
Those relating to this love language will value their partner going our of their way to make their life easier. This can be anything from surprising them with breakfast to cleaning the house on their own accord. In this instance, it’s the little things. The phrase, ‘actions speak louder than words’ may come to mind when discussing this love language. Therefore, they may feel unimportant or frustrated by laziness or broken promises in their relationship.
Receiving gifts
A pretty self-explanatory one. We probably all like receiving gifts but these people thrive off it more than others. A gift to them proves that they are special. It’s important to note that the gifts do not need to be materialistic. It can be a gift such as being surprised with your favourite snack. The focus here is on the symbolic value of the gift, not the monetary value. It’s about the thought that has gone into this visual sign of love.
Quality time
If this is you then you are likely to feel most loved when your partner shows that they actively want to spend time with you. Signs of your partner being present in the moment with you are highly regarded and frustration may arise from things such as your partner being distracted by their phone whilst spending time with you. You may particularly value eye contact and signs of your partner truly listening.
Physical touch
You feel loved by acts of hugging, kissing, holding hands and other forms of physical affection. This may offer you feelings of warmth and safety. You may find that physical touch allows you to feel more emotionally connected to your partner.
Which love language do you feel you relate to the most?
